Wednesday, April 6, 2011
I've Moved!
Yes, its true. I've found a new home; if you landed here looking for me, please follow me here. Stop by and say hi!
Monday, November 8, 2010
No. 7
Ha, ha, ha. So much for my planned continuity. I haven't posted anything since January and now its November! OK, so I've been alittle distracted, a little busy, a lot overwhelmed. What can I say. I have been making progress in certain areas though.
And hopefully, with a lot of help, I'll get things moving forward so that I can get where I want to be!
And hopefully, with a lot of help, I'll get things moving forward so that I can get where I want to be!
Saturday, January 23, 2010
No. 6
Well, I've been doing some thinking the last couple weeks; and I've been thinking (again) that I need to find a new job. I can't say I hate where I work now, especially since I've been there almost 24 years; but I think the whole atmosphere is changing now.
I don't know if its the education system, the state or just the area I'm in now, but I think I seriously need to come up with a good plan and then follow through with it to make a positive change in my life. For my own personal, spiritual and even physical health!
I will look into what I can have available to me if I quit versus if I retire or any other choice that comes across my way.
I'll have to start conserving my resources and getting any big expenses out of the way, plus pay down all those stupid credit cards! And then finally, I'll have to decide what I want to do (now that I've grown up).
I don't know if its the education system, the state or just the area I'm in now, but I think I seriously need to come up with a good plan and then follow through with it to make a positive change in my life. For my own personal, spiritual and even physical health!
I will look into what I can have available to me if I quit versus if I retire or any other choice that comes across my way.
I'll have to start conserving my resources and getting any big expenses out of the way, plus pay down all those stupid credit cards! And then finally, I'll have to decide what I want to do (now that I've grown up).
Saturday, January 9, 2010
No.5
Date night tonight; ok, so not exactly as it sounds....date night with a girlfriend; which is a rare and wonderful kind of date. You can do no wrong, you can say no wrong, you could probably even do something horrible and it would still be ok--girlfriends, real girlfriends are down with anything. Seriously, they are.
Its very hard find someone like that in your life, and chances are (at least with me) it won't be your "significant other." How is it that someone you've known since forever (ok, not quite, but almost), can get you like no one else? If that sounds like I'm slipping over to the other side, no fear; that won't happen, I do like those male parts--and not just the physical ones!
But having real girlfriends is something special; I wonder if men have friends like that--where they can let their hair down (so to speak) and be real without worrying about the consequences?
From the few men I've known in my life, which is nowhere near a sampling type of number, I think not. And I think that anyone who has a partner like that in their life, should hold on for dear life and truly appreciate the gift they've been given.
As for the rest of us, I say--take a look at your girlfriends, and appreciate all the gifts that they bring into your life!
Its very hard find someone like that in your life, and chances are (at least with me) it won't be your "significant other." How is it that someone you've known since forever (ok, not quite, but almost), can get you like no one else? If that sounds like I'm slipping over to the other side, no fear; that won't happen, I do like those male parts--and not just the physical ones!
But having real girlfriends is something special; I wonder if men have friends like that--where they can let their hair down (so to speak) and be real without worrying about the consequences?
From the few men I've known in my life, which is nowhere near a sampling type of number, I think not. And I think that anyone who has a partner like that in their life, should hold on for dear life and truly appreciate the gift they've been given.
As for the rest of us, I say--take a look at your girlfriends, and appreciate all the gifts that they bring into your life!
Thursday, January 7, 2010
No. 4
I hate being sick; more than that, I hate feeling sick. I think that happens alot more than my actually being sick; its also easier to ignore, which puts me at risk of actually being sick. Vicious cycle I know, but very hard to break.
So I've been home for 2 days now; not actually sick, but feeling really awful--sore, feverish (no fever though), nauseous, etc. But also very productive, in a sneaky way. Jeannie was having her "friend" come to clean up & re-organize the garage yesterday; and boy did we find a treasure.
I always knew my grandma painted a lot of china and some canvases; but never really saw much except what has always been out. We uncovered a treasure-trove of her work yesterday--notebooks, sketches, and maybe a dozen canvases in various states of starting/stopping/giving up. Some were really beautiful; some not; but I plan to put more of them up in the house now, just because this is/was her house and these paintings were done when she lived here.
I hope this would make her happy to know that I found them, enjoy them and plan to put them up. She was never (to my knowledge) very happy; she was bitter and old by the time I tried to get to know her. Its hard to get through to someone in that state; kind of like banging your head against the wall; it feels so much better when you stop.
So I do somewhat believe in ghosts, or spirits or something like that; and I do know that I've felt my grandfather here in this house with me. Her not so much, but maybe this will appease her, make her happy or happier to know that I do love her here; love her house and all its surroundings and memories. And now she will be a bigger part of it than she has been, if only because I found more of her life here, her paintings & sketches & notes.
So I've been home for 2 days now; not actually sick, but feeling really awful--sore, feverish (no fever though), nauseous, etc. But also very productive, in a sneaky way. Jeannie was having her "friend" come to clean up & re-organize the garage yesterday; and boy did we find a treasure.
I always knew my grandma painted a lot of china and some canvases; but never really saw much except what has always been out. We uncovered a treasure-trove of her work yesterday--notebooks, sketches, and maybe a dozen canvases in various states of starting/stopping/giving up. Some were really beautiful; some not; but I plan to put more of them up in the house now, just because this is/was her house and these paintings were done when she lived here.
I hope this would make her happy to know that I found them, enjoy them and plan to put them up. She was never (to my knowledge) very happy; she was bitter and old by the time I tried to get to know her. Its hard to get through to someone in that state; kind of like banging your head against the wall; it feels so much better when you stop.
So I do somewhat believe in ghosts, or spirits or something like that; and I do know that I've felt my grandfather here in this house with me. Her not so much, but maybe this will appease her, make her happy or happier to know that I do love her here; love her house and all its surroundings and memories. And now she will be a bigger part of it than she has been, if only because I found more of her life here, her paintings & sketches & notes.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
No. 3
Does it make me a horrible person to tell Jeannie she can't bring another pet into my home? It makes me feel like I'm bursting her bubble; but there is so much shit everywhere I look--though I am talking metaphorically here--I just can't imagine bringing something else into my home. I know that is part of the reason I'm having so much trouble psychologically right now. I know I'm depressed about a lot of things in my life, especially about the lack of control I'm feeling in every aspect of my life!
So I'm not going to feel guilty about not allowing it. I do however know that I need to have a plan in mind for when she does try to bring a pet into the house. As much as I am an animal lover, and as much as I understand her want and even need of having that warmth just for her, I will not cave on this. I can not cave on this. When we were having the discussion tonight, I could tell she was actively planning on how she'll wear me down; unfortunately for her, my resolve on this is absolute.
I cannot have any more of anything brought into this house. And if that makes me a bitch, so be it!
So I'm not going to feel guilty about not allowing it. I do however know that I need to have a plan in mind for when she does try to bring a pet into the house. As much as I am an animal lover, and as much as I understand her want and even need of having that warmth just for her, I will not cave on this. I can not cave on this. When we were having the discussion tonight, I could tell she was actively planning on how she'll wear me down; unfortunately for her, my resolve on this is absolute.
I cannot have any more of anything brought into this house. And if that makes me a bitch, so be it!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
No. 2
New Year's Eve 2009; endings aren't always fun, no matter how much everyone celebrates. I'm going to focus on a new start tomorrow rather than think about old things (like 2009). There is a list of really do-able goals I made last night--ok it was 2 am, but I was still going on Wednesday evening time.
So I'm going to review those; commit to those; participate with those things and see where this world takes me from this point in my life. Although it doesn't always feel like I have much support, I can see it there today so I just need to focus on that part, those people and stay positive with where I want to go and what I want to be! Onward and Upward!
So I'm going to review those; commit to those; participate with those things and see where this world takes me from this point in my life. Although it doesn't always feel like I have much support, I can see it there today so I just need to focus on that part, those people and stay positive with where I want to go and what I want to be! Onward and Upward!
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